“I always have this fear that one day you are going to discover that I’m not as great as you once thought I was.”
I’m not exactly sure who made this quote, but it hit me hard. While I was growing up, I experienced a life-changing event. I remember it precisely. A breezy October day of the year 2004. It was the day that I became a big brother. Although I was quite still young at the time, that day has influenced my life from then, until now, until forever. As he grew, I grew. As he learned about and experienced the world, so did I. Eventually, we reached a point in life when he began to look up to me.
Everything I did with my life influenced his. He saw me as a role model, someone who he wanted to be when he grew up. As a result, I began to become cautious and aware of every thought and action I made, fearing that a wrong step will eventually lead him to make the same mistake. I tried to make his life as fun as possible, even when life decided otherwise.
My brother is only five years younger than me. We were just like any other brothers out there. Like others, we developed a closer relationship, as the years went by. I remember the days when we would play pranks on our sisters and have a good laugh about it later, despite getting in trouble with our parents. I remembered seeing him everyday at school since the school we went to taught preschool all the way to twelfth grade. He would always tell his friends, “Look, that’s my brother!” Then I would just wave back and walk away as I had classes to go to.
But slowly, we began to drift apart. I’m not sure if he just started to realize that I wasn’t as great as he used to think I was or what. All I know is that it happened. Maybe it was because I wasn’t admirable or inspirational to him anymore. Life, at that moment, turned around for me. I felt that our memories had drifted away from memory lane.
Nonetheless, from that moment on, I knew I had to regain that special bond we had.
The Little Things in Life 